DILEMMA!!!

Its a bright day today, not nearly as cold as other days. Well maybe I dont feel the heat even if there is any, cuz I've been indoors for the last few days. Havent been going to college for the last couple of days, hardly any classes going on. To think of it, I'm doing my final year Grad n its supposed to be crucial. But I done seem to be serious at all. A long time back I had applied to Writer's Bureau for a course to become a published writer. Alternatively, I chose a course which I was just about average at. Gave up the thought of studying journalism and got busy with that course. Today I got another mail by the Writer's Bureau about the course. My mum saw how happy I was reading the pamphlette. She knows how badly I wanna do a course in Journalism. She's told me if I want I can finish my Graduation this year n discontinue this professional course that I'm pursuing, if I want to. But I dont wanna leave what I've started. Its totally taxing my mind, n sometimes I just cant seem to take the pressure. I keep on rueing my bad decision of taking up this course. I say to myself, why dint I have that kind of confidence 3 years ago. I could have done so much better in the course I wanted, I could have been much more happy. Anyways, this is just a temporary phase. Keeps happening with me all the time. At times just wonder why did I take it up? I never wanted to do this?? What had come over me?? What was I thinking?? It all jus seems so hazy now like a long lost memory. But at the end of it, I know I wont quit, I wont give up. I just wont. As 50 Cents say "GET RICH OR DIE TRYIN"